Whats app Status facebook Funny Jokes

Aaj phir hamare group ke admin ne kamaal kar diya…

Wo savere savere bank me jaakar so gaya…
kyunki, waha likha tha ki
“Yaha Sone par loan diya jaata hai”
========================================
Admin ke hath mein naya Phone dekhkar

Dost bola:
Naya phone kab kharida?

Admin: naya nahin hai, Girfriend ka hai!

Dost: Girlfriend ka phone kyun le aaya!

Admin:
Roj kehti thi, mera phone nahin uthate, Aaj mauka mila.. Utha laaya
============================================
Hamare Whatsapp group Admin bachpan se hi kitne buddhiman hain iska ek pratyaksh udaharan:-

Jab wo kaksha 5 mein the, to unke shikshak ne kaksha mein puchha:
Senior aur Junior mein kya antar hai?

Keval admin ne hath khada kiya..

Shikshak ne kaha: Shabbas beta, Batao?

Admin: Sir jo samudra ke paas rehta ho wo senior (see-near),
aur Jo chidiyaghar ke pass rehta ho wo Junior (zoo-near)!
=======================================
Whats app group mein maun rehkar,
Sirf messages padhne walo ke liye
Zabardast offer!!!…

Bhootpurva PradhanMantri
Shri Manmohan Singh ji
Apna whatsapp group bana rahe hain..

Kripaya turant JOIN kar lein!!!

“First come first serve only!”
========================================
Whats App chhote bachho ke diaper ki tarah hota hai…
Hota kuchh nahin,
Lekin har 5 minute me check karna padta hai!
===============================
Attitude of Girls :
When a Boy Sends Dirty SMS
She Laughs For 10 Minutes,
Forwards That to Her Friends
and..
Then Replies the Boy
I Don’t Like That Kind of SMS!!
================================
Admin jalebi bech raha tha,
lekin bola raha tha.. “Aaloo le lo aaloo”

Santa: Yeh to jalebi hai..

Admin : Abe chup ho ja, warna makkhiya aa jayegi!

Intelligent hai na apna Admin!!
==================================

Admin par bijli ka taar gir gaya

Admin tadap-tadap ke marne hi wala tha ki
achanak…
Use yaad aaya ki bijli to 2 din se band hai..

Wapas uthkar, hanste hue bola,
Aailaa..
Yaad nahin aata to mar hi jaata!
========================================

 Son came late…

Mom: beta kaha gaya tha..??

Beta: – Mom movie dekhne gaya tha.

Mom: Beta Kaunsi..?

Beta: MAA KI MAMTA

Mom: Ja beta upar ja nayi film lagi hai.

Beta: Maa , kaunsi..?

Maa: BAAP KA KEHAR
============================================
A Boy and a Girl were walking on the road..

They found a 1000 Rupees Note on the road

Girl : what to do with this money now?

Boy : lets take 50-50

Girl: Okay but baaki ke 900 Rs ka kya karenge ?
======================================================
Kapil Sharma and a Girl were standing on a Bus Stop

Kapil: Oo Ji Main kha… Nice Lipstick

Girl: Thanks

Kapil: Oo Ji Main kha… Nice Top and Jeans

Girl: Thanks

Kapil: Oo Ji Main kha… Nice Earrings

Girl: Thanks

Kapil: Aur to aur Nice Necklace

Girl: Thank you So Much BHAIYA…

Kapil: Kamaal Hai, Itni saari acchhi cheezein, Phir bhi tu Bhootni Lag rahi hai… !!
====================================
Ladka: I love you <3 Ladki: Sorry, Main kisi aur se pyar karti hoon… Ladka udas ho gaya :-(
Fir achanak bhagne laga aur bola

Teri mummy ko bataunga ...

Ladki: Ruk ja kamine, Main to mazaak kar rahi thi… I love you too <3 :-p
=====================================
A Gujarati Bhai & Chinese in a train.

A cockroach enters.
Chinese catches it & eats it!

Another cockroach enters.
Gujju catches & asks d chinese: Kharidega?
=================================================
Wife:
Jab Tum Desi Sharab peete Ho To Mujhe Paaro Kehte ho
Beer Peete ho To Darling…
Par Aaj Bhootni kyun kaha…?

Husband:
Aaj maine SPRITE Pee hai
“Seedhi Baat No Bakwas”
===============================

Whats app Status Facebook Funny Jokes

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Whats app Santa sardar funny Jokes in Hindi

Funny Jokes In Hindi Best Collection for you Free Download and Share on your Status.   

• Sir: Define Energy ?

Santa Sardar: Sir poora nahin aata hai, thoda last ka pata hai, bas.

Sir: Thik hai, koi baat nahin, jitna aata hai utna bolo.
Santa: “and this is called Energy…

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•  Ek baar Santa Singh ne ek MENDAK se puchha ki ‘Sardaro me dimag hota hai’?

Mendak bola: nahin, Aur paani mein kood gaya.

Santa Sardar pura din sochta raha isme SUICIDE karne wali kya baat thi ?

========================================================================

•  Ek baar ek Punjab Roadways ki bus ja rahi thi
  
  Conductor: Kahan jaana hai?
  
  Pakistani: Amritsar jana hai…
  
  Saath me baithe Sardar (Mr. Santa) ne Pakistani ko jor se thappad maara aur bola
  “Tu Shri Amritsar Sahib nahin bol sakta kya??”
  
  Conductor (Dusre Pakistani se): Tumhein kaha jaana hai?
  
  Pakistani Darr kar bola: “Shri Chandigarh Sahib Jana hai..”
  
  Sath baitha Sardar ise bhi thappad maarkar bola:
  “Kya waha tere baaap ki Shahidi hui thi jo Sahib laga raha hai..!”
  
  Conductor (3rd Pakistani se): Tumhe kaha jana hai?
  
  Pakistani: “Yeh lo paise aur puchh sardar se lo…”
  
  Sardar (thappad maark kar) bola:
  “Sardar ke sath Ji kya tera baap lagayega
  ========================================== 
  
  
  
  
  •  Santa 2 cigarettes ek saath peeta thaa.
    
    Banto (Santa’s Wife): Ek sath 2 cigarette kyon peete ho?
    
    Santa: Dost kee yaad aati hai na … ek meri hoti hai aur ek mere dost kee…
    
    Kuchh dino baad Santa ek hi cigarette peene laga…
    
    Banto ne poochha – Dost ko bhool gaye kya?
    
    Santa : Nahin Pagli, maine cigarette peena chhod diya hai
  • =======================================
  • Santa ne “Live Radio Station” call ki : Hello.. ji ye Radio station hai ?
    
    RJ: ji Haan
    
    Santa: Meri awaaz pura shehar sun raha hai ?
    
    R.J: Haan
    
    Santa: Yani ghar mein jo meri biwi Radio sunn rahi hai.. wo Bhi sun rahi hogi..?
    
    R.J (Gusse me) : Haaan bhai haan..!!
    
    Santa: Hello Banto! Agar meri aawaz sun rahi hai.. toh jaldi se Motor chala de…!
    Main uper chhat par bathroom mein hoon aur tanki mein Paani khatam ho gaya hai…
  • ========================================
  • Santa was going on a bike with his beautiful wife .
    
    Tapori : Sardarji , wife hai ya lover ?
    
    Santa: Saale lover hogi teri, meri to wife hai….
    ===========================================
  • Sardarji introducing his family:-
    
    1. Yeh hai meri biwi….. Google Kaur..
    Ek sawal poocho toh 10 jawab deti hai…..
    
    2. Yeh hai mera beta…. Facebookjeet Singh..
    Ghar ki baat sare colony tak pahuchata hai…..
    
    3. Yeh hai meri beti…. Twitterpreet Kaur..
    Poori colony isse folow karti hai…..
    
    4. Aur mein hoon Orkutdeep Singh….
    Mujhe koi puchhta hi nahi…. !!
  • =======================================
  • Dad entered Son’s room and found him asleep on his books, tired of exam studies.
    
    He walked closer to him..
    and played with his hair softly, sweetly
    
    and….
    
    BAAANNNG  Slapped his face…
    
    and said:
    
    “Last seen on whatsapp 1 minute ago”
  • ====================================
  • Ladki wale(ladke se): Beta kya kerte ho…?
    
    Ladka: jee, Chief administrator Hun.
    
    Ladki wale (khush hokar): Kaun si company mein beta…?
    
    Ladka: WhatsApp per 2 Groups aur Facebook per 3 Pages ka Admin hun..
  • ===================================
  • Taj Mahal ko dekh kar
    bola shahjahan ka pota..
    
    Taj Mahal ko dekh kar
    bola shahjahan ka pota..
    
    Aaj apna bhi bank balance hota
    Agar dada aashiq na hota!
  • ====================================

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