Whats app Status facebook Funny Jokes

Aaj phir hamare group ke admin ne kamaal kar diya…

Wo savere savere bank me jaakar so gaya…
kyunki, waha likha tha ki
“Yaha Sone par loan diya jaata hai”
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Admin ke hath mein naya Phone dekhkar

Dost bola:
Naya phone kab kharida?

Admin: naya nahin hai, Girfriend ka hai!

Dost: Girlfriend ka phone kyun le aaya!

Admin:
Roj kehti thi, mera phone nahin uthate, Aaj mauka mila.. Utha laaya
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Hamare Whatsapp group Admin bachpan se hi kitne buddhiman hain iska ek pratyaksh udaharan:-

Jab wo kaksha 5 mein the, to unke shikshak ne kaksha mein puchha:
Senior aur Junior mein kya antar hai?

Keval admin ne hath khada kiya..

Shikshak ne kaha: Shabbas beta, Batao?

Admin: Sir jo samudra ke paas rehta ho wo senior (see-near),
aur Jo chidiyaghar ke pass rehta ho wo Junior (zoo-near)!
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Whats app group mein maun rehkar,
Sirf messages padhne walo ke liye
Zabardast offer!!!…

Bhootpurva PradhanMantri
Shri Manmohan Singh ji
Apna whatsapp group bana rahe hain..

Kripaya turant JOIN kar lein!!!

“First come first serve only!”
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Whats App chhote bachho ke diaper ki tarah hota hai…
Hota kuchh nahin,
Lekin har 5 minute me check karna padta hai!
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Attitude of Girls :
When a Boy Sends Dirty SMS
She Laughs For 10 Minutes,
Forwards That to Her Friends
and..
Then Replies the Boy
I Don’t Like That Kind of SMS!!
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Admin jalebi bech raha tha,
lekin bola raha tha.. “Aaloo le lo aaloo”

Santa: Yeh to jalebi hai..

Admin : Abe chup ho ja, warna makkhiya aa jayegi!

Intelligent hai na apna Admin!!
==================================

Admin par bijli ka taar gir gaya

Admin tadap-tadap ke marne hi wala tha ki
achanak…
Use yaad aaya ki bijli to 2 din se band hai..

Wapas uthkar, hanste hue bola,
Aailaa..
Yaad nahin aata to mar hi jaata!
========================================

 Son came late…

Mom: beta kaha gaya tha..??

Beta: – Mom movie dekhne gaya tha.

Mom: Beta Kaunsi..?

Beta: MAA KI MAMTA

Mom: Ja beta upar ja nayi film lagi hai.

Beta: Maa , kaunsi..?

Maa: BAAP KA KEHAR
============================================
A Boy and a Girl were walking on the road..

They found a 1000 Rupees Note on the road

Girl : what to do with this money now?

Boy : lets take 50-50

Girl: Okay but baaki ke 900 Rs ka kya karenge ?
======================================================
Kapil Sharma and a Girl were standing on a Bus Stop

Kapil: Oo Ji Main kha… Nice Lipstick

Girl: Thanks

Kapil: Oo Ji Main kha… Nice Top and Jeans

Girl: Thanks

Kapil: Oo Ji Main kha… Nice Earrings

Girl: Thanks

Kapil: Aur to aur Nice Necklace

Girl: Thank you So Much BHAIYA…

Kapil: Kamaal Hai, Itni saari acchhi cheezein, Phir bhi tu Bhootni Lag rahi hai… !!
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Ladka: I love you <3 Ladki: Sorry, Main kisi aur se pyar karti hoon… Ladka udas ho gaya :-(
Fir achanak bhagne laga aur bola

Teri mummy ko bataunga ...

Ladki: Ruk ja kamine, Main to mazaak kar rahi thi… I love you too <3 :-p
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A Gujarati Bhai & Chinese in a train.

A cockroach enters.
Chinese catches it & eats it!

Another cockroach enters.
Gujju catches & asks d chinese: Kharidega?
=================================================
Wife:
Jab Tum Desi Sharab peete Ho To Mujhe Paaro Kehte ho
Beer Peete ho To Darling…
Par Aaj Bhootni kyun kaha…?

Husband:
Aaj maine SPRITE Pee hai
“Seedhi Baat No Bakwas”
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